What is Success?

November 5, 2010

How do we move from where we are to where we want to be?

How do we know that where we want to be is where we should be?

And if it is not, what do we do then?

Are we hiding from who we are because we fear the consequences of being who we are?

Do we even know who we are?

Are we afraid of the work that is going to be required to become who we are?

And if we’ve been denying our self and know it, and can’t look in the mirror and do it anymore, how are we going to connect the dots between the person we are in the flesh and who we are to become?

How do we connect?

How do we persist against adversity?

How do we make our connection?

How do we change?

This is not about management; it is about surrendering to who we really are.

This is about becoming who we really are.

The answers to “how to do” something is all about technique.  “How to” can be learned.  The commitment has to be born and we have to birth it.

We achieve the outcome by seeing it before it is here, and walking, running, pushing, meditating, cajoling, fighting, driving, diving our way through our imagination to its reality.  And if we are doing that, if we are on that path, at that moment in time, we are successful.

Chuck Markham



Independent Business People

October 21, 2010

Independent businesses contribute tremendous value.

The environment required in order for us to continue being able to do that is threatened every day – threatened by government and by big business.  We need level the playing field so that we are able to reach the public with our message and provide our products and services and show and tell and do what we do best: provide quality service and products at a great value.

What are you doing to elevate the visibility and educate the public of the value of the independent business person?





Often times when people see me that haven’t seen me in a while, they say, “hey, Chuck, you look great! What have you been doing?”  Not wanting to bore people who have know interest, I simply say, “I’ve been on a diet.”

Frequently, the response is something like, “diets don’t work for me, I find that if I just eat a balanced diet, that is the best thing.”  My judgment of their statement, for them, honestly, is based upon my unspoken value judgment of how it seems to be work for them.  One guy in my neighborhood has not only lost weight and kept it off with the, “just eat a balanced diet and walk a lot,” diet.  That is great for him, and frankly, he is a power of example for me.  But, he is not an example of what I can do.  Because, what I know to be true is that for 25 years I tried the eat balanced and walk a lot diet and failed miserably on all counts.  So, it has been necessary for me to eat an imbalanced diet that has as its primary goal, the loss of fat.  That is just what I’ve had to do.

This is something I blog about, because one of the judgmental voices in my head is – “oh come on Chuck, what’s the big deal, why don’t you just man up, eat balanced and walk a lot,” and I’m writing this to remind me that I tried that for a very long time and it was something I personally was not able to be successful at doing.

Interestingly enough, now that I have been successful at knocking off some pounds, I’m becoming more successful at walking a lot and have thrown swimming in there of late as well.  In fact, my increased activity may be accounting for some of the slowdown in my weight loss as muscle starts to form.

The answer for me, once the diet ends, is going to be another lifetime program – such as the Zone diet or something that the nutritionist creates for me because left to my own devices, I must admit, I really don’t make great food choices!!




In April, when my weight loss started, until the middle of August, it was a sprint.  Boom, boom, boom – the weight came off.  Sure there were a few issues (constipation, for instance) but I felt energetic and the diet was working.  Then came a week when my weight didn’t go down.  Let me just tell you, there is the money I’m spending on the diet, the time the … and the internal chatter begins:  The next week, up another ¾ of a pound.

During the previous week, I’d already made some obvious changes that pertain to my specific diet that may have been pushing the envelope.  Now it was time to take a look at some of the other areas where I thought things were okay but in fact were not ok.  For instance, the issue of constipation needed to be dealt with.  This blog is not intended to be a medical blog and what I do may not work for anyone else, so I won’t get into specifics, but suffice it to say that I consulted a nutritionist about that.  Over the weekend was a wedding with lots of my favorite foods.  That presented challenges.  And then Saturday night we went out and the salad I ordered came different than I thought it was going to.

All of the sudden, this sprint is turning into a Marathon.  Today, I feel like I’m settling into the Marathon stride.  It is really testing a muscle of mine that needs to be tested. I’m a person with infinite interests, my mind is like a flywheel, spinning from one thought to the next.  In the type of work I do, counseling and coaching, every hour is a different set of issues.  This requires staying power.




“We are always successful.” – Maxwell Maltz

This means

  • we are successful at what we really see happening.

This means:

  • It is important to develop a vision rather than letting it happen.
  • Fear is our first reaction to change. The second reaction is our choice. Without activation of choice, fear, de facto, becomes vision.
  • We, with our powerful brain of our always have a vision.
  • Our brain knows where it is going.
  • The goal is to bring our whole self, including our brain, into alignment.
  • Bring your goals and your vision together.

If you want to make more money and to have a better relationship with your spouse and start the day knowing that things at work are a mess and old issues are suffocating your love life: it is going to be ugly.

On the other hand if you wake up knowing that today is going to be successful and that you have a loving relationship with another caring person, all kinds of doors will open. They may not be the ones you expect. Without the expectation of positive outcome the likelihood of seeing the open doors are remote and the likelihood of walking through them is remoter still.

Vision is the GPS (global positioning system) of your brain. Vision is how you know where to go. So, if you envision failure, your brain will, with all due obedience, open the door to all the opportunities that you need in order to fail. It is trained on that spot.
Vision is what you actually know is going to happen.

So, right now, you may know that if you don’t do x, y and z this terrible thing is going to happen. It is time to develop a new vision. Write it down. Shape it. As the song says, “Make it real or forget about it.”

One of the things that I do with clients is help them to get very clear about what they believe to be true and what they want.

Getting our beliefs and our wants together as one is how we set our own GPS.
Develop effective goals.



Coach Chuck


To learn more go to www.businesscoachchuck.com.

Take a Test Drive – Call now for your FREE 30-minute exploratory consultation – Call 973-670-7215 and set up an appointment. There is never any pressure.

Or e-mail me – chuck@businesscoachchuck.com. Please provide three dates and times that would be a good time to call you. I will return the e-mail with a confirmed appointment time.

The GPS of Your Success

June 24, 2010

The GPS goes to the very heart of the coaching experience. Like the any Global Positioning System, it establishes where we are. Like the GPS in your car, it is also where we set our destination. Where do we want to go? Like the GPS, when we set it, it is set without judgment. We don’t care. As an Author of the Law of Attraction says, the GPS does not make fun of you for having tried to get there before, or remind you what you mother thinks of you wanting to go there or that your neighbors would or would not approve. We are simply setting the GPS for a particular destination.
When we know where we want to go, most of us know generally what we need to do to get there. By the time we’ve sought help, we’ve tried to get there already and for one reason or another have not been successful. As a coach our goal is to help you to stay the course, make adjustments to the planned route where needed and to keep moving. Along the way, we may run into obstacles that are very old which may require counseling. That is a great opportunity. Our Challenges are our greatest opportunity. If counseling is needed we will recommend that it happen parallel, but different than coaching. When all of this works together, we learn that our challenges, our difficulties are, in fact, our greatest assets, because once they are overcome, the experience of that success can be leveraged in ways that are incalculable from the position before the experience. RD Lang referred to experience as something that changes us. Coaching is an experience. Coaching attempts to move us to places we have sensed but been unable to reach. The GPS is set, regardless of obstacles, we keep moving in that direction

Coach Chuck



Coach Chuck


Take the Next Step to Your Picture of Success
Go To – www.businesscoachchuck.com. – for details of Coach Chuck’s business coaching services and fees.
Take a Test Drive – Call now for your FREE 30-minute exploratory consultation – Call 973-670-7215 and set up an appointment. There is never any pressure.
Or e-mail me – chuck@businesscoachchuck.com. Please provide three dates and times that would be a good time to call you. I will return the e-mail with a confirmed appointment time.
©2007 Charles W. Markham MA. You may not copy, reproduce, post or forward this document in any format. For permission or joint venture opportunities contact Chuck Markham at chuck@businesscoachchuck.com.